Moral Policing of Women Eclipses the Crimes of Men
It is an age-old story that repeats itself year after year. As victims come forth with their accounts of assault, rape, and violent crimes they faced at the hands of men, their harrowing experiences are ridiculed, the crime against them becomes their shame, their actions are scrutinized, and their character is maligned. Amidst these recriminations, the perpetrators are often forgotten, their crimes overshadowed by the collective hatred of our society for women who fail to be perfect victims and who dare to make mistakes and to sin like men. The culprit is absolved of his sins, for he was manipulated, his interest piqued, and his assault a mere reaction, while the very victims are accused as accomplices to the crime.
Victim Blaming: A Rule from the Patriarchal Playbook Transcending Borders
What were you wearing? Did you say something to pique his interest? Can you prove your claims? Why didn’t you tell someone? Why come forward now? A chorus of such questions and accusations follows victims of men’s violence across the globe. The treatment of women in the aftermath of their allegations and accounts of violence is embarrassingly similar around the world.
When the Harvey Weinstein case shook up Hollywood, 80 women came forth, providing details of the coercion, pressure, and manipulation they faced at the hands of a man who held the power to uproot their careers, their dreams, and their livelihoods. Forced to sign NDAs, for years these women suffered in silence while the beloved director found new victims. Many knew of the devil that lurked behind the facade of a celebrated Hollywood director, yet many continued to offer their support to a man accused by 80 women of rape.
Fashion icon Donna Karan posed the same question that many others before her had.
“What are they asking for? Trouble… Are we asking for it by presenting all the sensuality and all the sexuality?”
Weinstein’s own lawyer, Donna Rotunno, carried this logic into the trial itself. She declared:
“I have not [been sexually assaulted] because I would never put myself in that position.”
It is not surprising that these women sided with a man accused of rape after all, as bell hooks says, “Patriarchy has no gender.” It was perhaps this very callousness that sparked the #MeToo movement in the USA, which later spread across the globe. Empowered by a sense of camaraderie, women came forward with their stories of pain and suffering inflicted by men. Many in Pakistan, including celebrities, gave their own accounts. Still, like those beyond our own borders, women of Pakistan were also met with suspicion and questions about their silence (ironically), the state of their clothes, and the convenient timing of their confessions.
No sympathy was offered, no outrage against the perpetrators, just sheer indifference to the suffering of women disguised as a rational and logical approach to questioning allegations. Victims face indifference and fall prey to the collusion of men and women who serve as unpaid PR agencies for criminals, pointing fingers at the victim and successfully diverting attention from the actual crime to the apparent sins and compliance of a woman in the very crime against her. I wonder if a man is stabbed to death by his own weapon, does it make him an accomplice to his own death? Should the dead man now be hanged for dying?
Social Media and the Pious Jury
Social media is the kangaroo court, where women are held on trials by supposedly perfect, pious, and saintly juries. A few screenshots, videos, or messages of interaction between the victim and the culprit that could easily be generated are enough for the jury to absolve the man of his crime, while the victim’s cries fall on deaf ears. The jury passes the verdict, and the hounds in our social media plaster the victim’s face across their channels with bold headlines. The perpetrator’s face, crime, and identity are obscured by moral policing and pontification from the social media saints. Social media is a double-edged sword; it expedites justice while concurrently exposing victims to policing and victim-blaming. Fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, our chronically short attention span and the fickle algorithms, no longer amused, jump onto the next trend; the crime and subsequent recriminations are forgotten.
Excuses for Men and Contempt for Women
While the perpetrators move on, the victims remember. They remember how the world treated them, so they heed that it’s better to pay the price for a man’s crime with silence. Mistakes aren’t for women to make; that is a privilege reserved for men. Every excuse offered is an accusation levied against women. Take the case of the woman killed on the orders of a tribal leader in Balochistan; an elected official found it pertinent to mention that the woman was married with children, followed by stating it wasn’t an excuse for the crime. For a man, there is always an excuse to lessen the heinousness of the crime. Even in death, women garner no sympathy; they are sinners who are reprimanded for the same sins indulged in by men.
The Need to Refigure Discourse around Crimes of Violence by Men
Jackson Kaltz, in his book “The Macho Paradox,” highlights how traditional discourse tends to term domestic abuse, rape, assault, honor killings, and femicide as “women’s issues.” Language is of importance, especially as it shapes our discourses; hence, Kaltz insists that these crimes must be labeled as “men’s issues.” The focus of our discussion and mainstream discourse must shift towards the men who commit such crimes and what aspects of our society enable men to commit such heinous crimes.
Attention needs to be redirected towards the accused rather than questioning the veracity of the victims’ accounts. It hasn’t been long since the victim of the motorway rape case was blamed for the crime she had no part in. Questioned for exercising the basic right of mobility, the discussion shifted from the actual crime; men and women alike stated how women should travel with husbands, fathers, or brothers so that such incidents don’t happen. Instead of holding those responsible for our protection accountable, we espouse prevention measures.
The Echo Chambers of Misogyny Shaping Our Morality
Social media and its virtual residents are methodological and mechanical; their morality and stances are dictated less by what is right and more by what the algorithms dictate. In case of such incidents, rage bait and hate-fueled content often gain much more traction in contrast with logic-based argumentation. This results in the creation of echo chambers where our own misogynistic opinions are validated. Furthermore, it reinforces such perspectives as those of the majority. Morality, after all, is a social construct, so our indifference towards the plight of women is sanctioned. Standards of virtue are forced upon women while men are exempt. Perhaps what is most disheartening is to witness women spouting hate-fueled rhetoric, reinforcing patriarchal notions of honor and purity associated with women.
The Way Forward
To move forward, we must refuse this narrative. We must recognize how rhetoric fueled by misogyny and orthodox concepts of honor sets us back in creating a safe environment for women, not only in the real but also the virtual world. Justice begins not only in courts but also in the way we choose to listen, believe, and stand with survivors. If such treatment of victims continues, we stand at the risk of an endemic of violence by emboldened men who find their actions validated by the virtuous and righteous among us.
If you want to submit your articles and/or research papers, please visit the Submissions page.
To stay updated with the latest jobs, CSS news, internships, scholarships, and current affairs articles, join our Community Forum!
The views and opinions expressed in this article/paper are the author’s own and do not necessarily reflect the editorial position of Paradigm Shift.
